2 Jokes for Father

MACHO si FATHER

Lady: Father, ang gwapo at cute mo naman! Bakit ka pa kasi nagpari? (Gosh Father, you are cute and handsome! Why did you become a priest?)

Priest: Dahil ayaw pumayag ng magulang ko na magmadre ako! Bruha! ( Because my parents did not want me to become a nun! You witch!)

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FOLLOW THE LEADER

Sa prusisyon. ( In a church procession)

Pari: Ang mga boys, sunod sa karo ni San Jose , mga girls, sa karo ni Mama Mary.

Priest: Boys, follow the float of St. Joseph.... girls , to Mother Mary's.

Bakla: Kami father, saan kami susunod?

Gay: Father, whom shall we follow?

Pari: Mga bruha! Follow me!

Priest: You Witches! Follow me!

4 JOKES for the DAY

MANA SA AMA
NANAY: Bobo ka talaga! 1 to 10 lang di mo kayang bilangin? (You are stupid, son! You don't even know how to count from 1 to 1o!)
ANAK: Mas bobo si tatay nay, kasi narinig ko minsan sabi, "Tama na inday,hanggang tatlo lang kaya ko." (Father is more stupid , Mother. One time I heard him said to our maid, " Stop it Inday... I can only have 3!)
















TEXT KAY DADDY NA NASA ABROAD

"Luv, tnx sa padala mo, hapi c nene kasi tobleron ang baon sa skul. Yong nike suot na ni jr. next tym wag ka na padala NIVEA MILK. di nila type pait daw.ako tuloy ang umubos.

TEXT MESSAGE to HUSBAND who is working OVERSEAS

"Love, thank you for the things you sent us. Nene is very happy because she will have TOBLERON for her school break. Jr. is already wearing his Nike shoes. Next time, don't send anymore NIVEA MILK. Your children don't like the taste. It's so bitter that's why I consumed it all!"
MULTIPLE CHOICE

MISTER: ano ang pagkain natin?
MISIS: nasa mesa, bahala ka na pumili!
MISTER: isang pirasong tuyo? ano pagpipilian ko?
MISIS: pumili ka kung kakain ka o hindi!



English Translation
Husband: What is our lunch?

Wife: It's on the table. Just choose what you like.

Husband: One piece of dried fish? What are the choices?

Wife: Choose whether you will eat or not!


IDD call from US: (EXPANDING)

HUSBAND: hon musta ang tindahan? (Hon, how's is our grocery store?)
WIFE: dept store na! (It's already a department store!)
HUSBAND: ang tuba-an? (The liquor store?)
WIFE: KTV bar na! (It's already a KTV bar!)
HUSBAND: ang mga tri-sikad? (The tricycle?)
WIFE: taxi na! (It's already a taxi!)


HUSBAND: ang dalawa kong anak? (My 2 children?)

WIFE: LIMA na! (They are already 5!)

COMING HOME with SADNESS

On the first of June 2008, I need to return to my first home -the Philippines - not with great joy but with sadness. The other day, 31 May 2008 , my father expired. He had a stroke. He was DOA at the nearby hospital. We were in shock and in grief but we were relieved that he did not suffer much. Always, he told us that if the time comes, he really did not want to recover if it will bring much sufferings to the family. Nakita kasi niya yong iba naming kapitbahay na nagkaroon ng major stroke at nabuhay na parang gulay kung hindi man paralisado o hindi naging maganda ang kinahinatnan.

We are sad not much on my father's passing because we know that he is at peace with his Creator but more so on the thought that my mother will be without a partner. Four of his 6 remaining children are overseas. The only consolacion is that my mother is a strong lady.

It is sad but this is a reality that we all endure.

On behalf on my family, I would like to thank those who offer prayers, sympathy and condole with us on this painful situation.