INTELLIGENT QUOTIENT (I.Q. BAGA!)

PASSING THE TEST

Ama: Bakit ka umiiyak?

Father: Why are you crying?

Anak: Pumasa po kasi ako sa test. Huhuhu!

Daughter: I passed the test. Hu-hu-hu!

Ama: Aba , magaling! Anong subject yun, anak?

Father: Very good! What is that subject, my daughter?

nak: Pregnancy test po itay!

Daughter: Pregnancy test, Dad!

GOOD MANNERS AND RIGHT CONDUCT (GMRC)

Anak: Inay, ang galing ng titser ko.

Son: Mom, my teacher is good.

Inay: Bakit naman?

Mother: Why?

Anak: Tinuruan kami ng kagandahang asal.

Son: She taught us good manners.

Nanay: Eh di marunong ka nang gumalang at magpo at opo?

Mother: So you know how to be respectful and say "po" and "opo"?

Anak: Natural! Tanga ka ba?

Son: Naturally! Are you insane?

SLOW LEARNER

Boy1: Bakit mo ako sinuntok?

Child 1: Why did you punch me?

Boy2: Tinawag mo akong hipopotamus!

Child 2: Because you called me a hippopotamus?

Boy1: Last year pa yon! Tarantado!

Child 1: That was last year, stupid!

Boy2: Eh kanina ko lang nakita picture ng hippopotamus, bobo!

Child 2: I just saw the picture of a hippopotamus a while ago, you moron!

INTELLIGENT MAID

Hindi makapagtimpla ng juice si Inday. Tahimik lang syang nakatitig sa bote ng juice. Dahil nakasulat: Concentrate.

Inday cannot prepare the fruit juice. She is very quiet staring only at the bottle. Written on it: Concentrate.